Why I wasn’t the gayest man in Philadelphia.

Mr. Gay Philadelphia 2012For those of you that are fortunate enough to not be my friend (or be anywhere around me for that matter), this weekend I competed in a beauty pageant.  I was competing for Mr Gay Philadelphia.  As my father stated, I was competing to be the gayest man in Philadelphia.  And who wouldn’t want a sash and crown for that?  I mustered up my courage, found the sexiest bathing suit I had (ok I bought one for the occasion), and strutted around on stage.  If you ever have the burning desire to feel judged regarding every part of your body…this is an event you might want to consider!  After Saturday night, to every runway model in the world, I totally commend you on what you do…you may not have any brains in that head of yours, but you’ve got bigger balls than I ever will.  I’d like to say that it was a lot of fun…but never again. I’ll stick with making fun of your overly large, 95 pound figures from the audience, its much easier on my part.

So the one with the brawniest balls?

Self ConfidenceMy new friend Nathan.  I normally don’t drop names in my blog but he knows I’m writing this, so im good to go.  So Nathan, who won Mr. Congeniality, took that pageant to a whole new level.  For evening wear, this guy, walked out on stage looking like he wandered off of a nativity scene.  Praising Allah on stage and all, I told him the only way that the boy following him would get noticed, was if he followed up by being naked.  But leave it to Nathan to take care of that too.  Along came the swim suit portion and of course he walked out in the Borat bathing suit!  Now we were competing against all the hotties in the Philly area, and (taking a wild guess) he knew he wouldn’t beat out people who do personal training for a living.  So what did he do? He mustered up the self-confidence and bared his balls on stage.

Self confidence is one thing that I found most people can never have enough of.  Do I look fat?  He wont go for someone like me.  No one likes what I have to offer.

There are a few facts that are universally true:

  1. You are who you are.
  2. You are the only one that can change you.
  3. People strive to be happy, and therefore are drawn to positive energy.

Borat's SuitNathan went on stage in practically butt floss but went out there with confidence.  You can tell from the vibe that he gives off that he is someone who is ok with who he is and what he does.  If you don’t know him, getting on stage is not uncommon.  As a drag queen, he’s the host of multiple shows that generally fill up with a crowd all the time.  Like I mentioned above, you can only change you and you are the one thing that might be keeping you from being happy.  Once you build up that positive energy through confidence, people will be drawn to it like flies and feces (sorry for the strange analogy, it’s Monday morning…).  Think about what you have to offer, everyone has something.  Use that as leverage to push yourself above the confidence bar and work it.  Nathan is a man of humor.  He used that as a way to show that he owned that stage.  And he certainly did because he won the congeniality award.

Look at what you have to offer, and use it to steal the spotlight.

When pictures are posted of the show, I’ll be sure to throw them up on my Facebook page.  Be sure to check later this week to see some of the highlights.

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5 Comments

Filed under Personal

5 responses to “Why I wasn’t the gayest man in Philadelphia.

  1. As always excellent blog. Nathan is definitely one of a kind with the things he does. I knew what to expect just from what Mrs. P(Nathan’s Other side) does in her shows. The contest was very entertaining and I took a bunch of pictures. But had to move out of my seat to get some good ones because I had Mimi Imfurst sitting in front of me being a judge. But your not a shy person Matt. You shouldn’t of had to muster up very much courage to compete in the competition.

  2. What makes Nathan a good showman is that he falls in the category I would call “Non-Babylonian Entertainers.” Babylonian entertainers are always worried about their next show: Where they’re gonna get booked next, who’s in the audience and what network they might be from, etc.

    Non-Babylonians don’t give a fuck. They’re there to entertain people. They’re showfolk. And they’re always, always more fun to watch.

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