“What’s a date?” Part 1

MilkshakesDating over the years has really changed.  My parents certainly did not go through the experiences that I’ve been going through the past couple of years.  With being gay as the new black, people are coming out all the time.  It’s definitely a good thing that people are becoming more open and comfortable with who they are but it creates an aura of needed sex that I don’t think we have seen since the 60s.  With the introduction of social media, the constant use of cell phones, and the ability to connect with just about anyone from any part of the globe, there is certainly a level of privacy and secrecy that every person now carries with them.  I hear people say, everyone in a relationship always wants to be single, but everyone single always wants a relationship.  The desire for a relationship has never changed, it’s the methods that we go about finding it that has.

  • Changing in the social scene- Dating used to be a slow and proper event where a man would find a suitable wife through close community friend, and neighbor, references.  Marriage itself was considered a passage to adulthood as well.  Nowadays people look more into the world of casual dating.  With the percentage of people getting married every year dropping, it is no surprise that going in and out of relationships is becoming rather common.  People don’t want the hassle of being tied down if they don’t have to be.
  • College Dating down the tubes- An esteemed college was a place of learning while and sitting next to the girl you had a crush on in an attempt to get noticed, just to ask her to the drive-in theater.  Now campuses are just full of sex.  Society has reversed back to the 60s with the belief of casual hooking up as a way of life.  I’m not saying that no one finds there one true love while in school, I’m just saying that the general population now sees these years as a way to dive deep into as many partners as they can.  Hence why the word “whore” can be thrown around SO casually among many groups of friends.Chris Brown and Rihanna
  • Society- From songs of birthday sex by artists that beat their partners, to dating shows where 20 people compete in competitions to gain the heart of the host, Hollywood has blown the idea and methods of dating out of the water.  It shows that society can find a partner in just about any way shape or form and the idea that you are seeking out multiple partners (or competing with them) is ok as well.

Social mediaIn my next post I’ll dive more into how a person’s privacy has changed over the years, and how the use of technology has changed the way we actually meet people and what we do once we are with them.  With the views of love and commitment changing back to what we saw 40 some years ago, it will only be a matter of time before history repeats itself and we go back to the idea that monogamy is important.

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5 Comments

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5 responses to ““What’s a date?” Part 1

  1. No matter what form of dating you use it’s not easy. For instance I would prefer to date a best friend rather then a complete stranger. I just feel the relationship would last longer because you already know each other so well. Though I’m also the type that anyone I talk to or meet on multiple occasions I consider them a friend. Not a close or best friend mind you. I consider them distant friends. I only have like 4 or 6 close friends. The rest of my circle of friends are distant friends. No matter what though for me dating is not easy, and it’s not for a lack of trying. I try I just don’t get any bites of any kind. It’s actually depressing for a hopeless romantic.

  2. I LOVE this especially the part about college dating. While I had boyfriends in college and didn’t do the casual sex thing, these boyfriends never took me on “dates” in the beginning. It always started as hooking up and turned into more. No more “courting” or whatever. Can’t wait til you write about privacy! Social media and technology has changed dating! For the worse, I think…now we have all this false sense of connection, and a witty text rapport can make you feel close to someone when in reality you don’t know them at all!

  3. Pingback: “What’s a Date?” Part 2 « myinnermostthinking

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